#99 Hold a World Record

It has always been a personal ambition to hold a Guinness World Record and have the certificate hanging on the wall confirming me as a world leader in my chosen field. Sadly my attempt at becoming the World’s shortest man was doomed to failure just after I passed my first birthday and it’s been gnawing away at me ever since (unfortunately not at a fast enough rate to bring my 5′ 11″ frame down below current record of 23.6 inches needed to make a viable challenge!).

Today marks the commencement of my quest for an entry into the Guinness Book of  World Records.

Shortlist with potential so far:

  • Fastest root vegetable to run a marathon – 3 hours, 9 minutes and 21 seconds
  • Most balloons inflated by the nose in 3 minutes – 23
  • Fastest mile on a space hopper  – currently 13 minutes (chance!)
  • Longest unicycle journey – 9125.97 miles (considering I still need to start #4 Unicycle round a 400m track, I think this one might be a non-starter. Never say never though!)
  • Fastest time to eat 15 Ferrero Rocher – 4 minutes and 2 seconds (gotta be possible that)

*Records correct at time of writing!


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